Someone do something!!!

In an effort to keep this forum from continuing to be boring every time I log in, I have decided to share Taun's favorite story of Mags IRL, with everyone. If you have not heard this before, I can virtually guarantee it is worth your time to read the following:

Summer time in Santa Cruz, a magical time where the stoner-students have left town, and the tourists have come in to replace them with equal parts annoyingness, stupidity, and annoying stupidity. I am at the height of my WoW addiction, Powerslaves(why was there never a "the"). My now ex-girlfriend hates the fact that I play the game instead of spending time with her and her growing waistline. Her patience is thin this particular Saturday evening as it is, and my insistence on partaking in the MC raid is only making things worse, we will join the action part way through:

Mags: Listen, there are 39 other people counting on me, I signed up for this raid on Monday, I can't just flake.

Jessica(name not changed to protect the non-innocent): I don't fucking care Adam(my real name, again, not changed to protect the non-innocent), you play that fucking game all the time. We're all going to the Boardwalk, and I refuse to let you fuck up another one of my nights by ditching me to play a game(yeah, she swore a lot, one of her better qualities).

Mags: You can't change me(possibly stated a bit too emphatically).

Jessica: You're a dipshit.



At this point, Jessica leaves the room in a huff. She's not generally the type to be lastingly angry....

AND YET...she returns with a new argument:


Jessica: I'm not happy, I want to be with someone who puts my needs above everything.

Mags: It's not that I don't care, but I really have been looking forward to those Flameguard Gauntlets.

Jessica: Fuck you.



Jessica leaves the room again, this time she is even more pissed off, she comes back just in time to hear a Mags who has now been swayed and/or annoyed by her needs.



Mags(to the raid): Hey guys, I'm really sorry, but I have to go. My girlfriend is losing her mind over me ditching her for another Saturday. I'm sorry, but RL has gotta win out this time.

Taun(making his first appearance of the evening): Hey Mags, that's ok, you go help that bitch find her mind(said with a snicker).

Mags: "laughing as a result of the clever New Zealand-style wordplay".

Jessica(who, remember, has come back into the room, still pissed off, still on edge, and with a crazy look in her eye): Are you going to say something, or are you just going to let that asshole insult me?

Mags: "dead silent with the exception of a giggle that slips out after a few seconds".


Jessica, though generally semi-passive, swings her fist menacingly at the head of her beau Adam(aka Mags). Adam(aka Mags) ducks to avoid the tiny fist onslaught, at which point, tiny fist onslaught crashes into the top of Adam(aka Mags') head(because I'm seated and much shorter). Jessica shreaks in pain as she makes contact, as she has just busted a digit on the top of Mags'(aka Adam's) apparently hard skull. Yes, you read that correctly, my ex-girlfriend broke her finger by skull punching me over the comments of a WoW player five thousand miles away.


Honestly people, of all of my time in WoW, this is my favorite story. God bless Taun and the stupid fucking things that he says.

I love you all, and yes, I am drunk...on Father's Day...but so is my dad, so...meh?

<3 Mags


P.S. I had to spend a good 3 hours in the ER with Jessica, and another 2 months or so worth of mental anguish to pay for this story. Enjoy it.

That is probably the greatest testament of Taun's moral qualities that I have ever heard.

The ability to not only insult someone he doesn't know, but by doing it causing that person to break their finger on Mag's head.

/applaud

Even after all the cruel things he ever said to me, about me, about my mother, about someone I am related to, or about someone I may know... Taun was, and is, simply amazing.

Lmao.
That's WoW at it's finest right there.

I'm amused you were seriously considering dating this banshee again.

Ryz wrote:

I'm amused you were seriously considering dating this banshee again.

I'm roughly 99% sure that we'll end up married in the end.

Let us know how that marriage works out for ya.

Is there really that kind of a dearth of acceptable females in the world? This kind of shit just blows my mind.

STOP PUTTING YOUR FUCKING PENIS IN CRAZY BITCHES, DUDES.

Show me these normal women, who are also accepting of us wow players playing said game, who also are relatively local and not to hard on the eyes, and i'll go date and fuck one of them. But until then, catch as catch can.

Oh pshah.
If guys stopped thinking with their second head and doing whoever the world would be an extremely boring place.
Keep porking those crazy hotties guys! Keep life exciting!

I'm too busy laughing my ass off at Bryn's gay dwarf avatar to respond.

I thought that the females had beards too? Nice story Mags.

Well, not to kill the vibe with a dose of reality, but we got along swimmingly when WoW was absent. Ryz is still going to be mad....

And as for Bryn, I think you should try looking for a normal woman sometime. They are stunningly difficult to find. And here's a hint: none of them work for the Abercrombie corporation.


-Mags

"Swimmingly," you say. I recall crying about her playing mind games and you taking her ice skating and stuff.

I like sex.

Do it all the time.

<.< >.>



Yep.

Yea Mags....of course no wow = happy crazy ex. All your attention was devoted to her.

Dreydier wrote:

Spazalus wrote:

Im a virgin.

Yep.

Yea Mags....of course no wow = happy crazy ex. All your attention was devoted to her.

Drey speaks the truth

Insert comment about ryz and jailbait here too.

*goes back to lurking the forum*

korenne wrote:

Dreydier wrote:

Spazalus wrote:

Im a virgin.

Yep.

Yea Mags....of course no wow = happy crazy ex. All your attention was devoted to her.

Drey speaks the truth

Insert comment about ryz and jailbait here too.

*goes back to lurking the forum*

Hey that's not what I said! But I do enjoy the anger it will bring from Ryz.

No anger here. Ryz is in a zenlike state currently, please check back for irrational anger later.

Azalus never ceases to amaze and disturb me. Continue representing your home state faithfully. I'm sure you'll be engaging in beastiality in no time. At least you won't be a virgin anymore?

Also, I think we've taken this thread in the wrong direction. If I end up marrying Jessica you all can probably look forward to many a comical story of love, anger, overreaction, and ultimate bone fragmentation.



-Mags

You could set up a webcam and make your very own sitcom, Mags.

I'd watch that.

I didn't like my original post so.....

I think that one was better Pol.

:]

Spazalus wrote:

I think that one was better Pol.

:]

Oh, burn.

hah!